My skin is all flabby since I left pilates andddd I’ve been sit down on my chair for almost two weeks. I’m trying to train pilates at home as I can’t pay the classes. I really look like an egyptian cat .________.
I DID IT, MAN!
I thought the colour was going to turn out more discrete BUT I DONT GIVE A SHIT THIS IS GORGEOUS!
I feel like my love for Hayley Williams has come out in that part of my hair
I have dyed my hair “copper” (orangeish red) and I have had the dye for so many hours that it has become a scab~
I’m going to the shower, I hope this time the dye works. It’s the third time I try to use it and the other two it faded in the first wash.
I’m so angry. Easter week is the only one I have to relax until the end of this course and I have been kicked out of my own house because my aunt is coming to visit. I love my aunt to death but I don’t fucking want to go the fuck away from my room. I want to BE LAZY, DO NOTHING, BE RELAXED, CRAFT, PAINT MY FUKING FAKE NAILS OR FART IF I WANT TO but I CAN’T! I will have to go the fuck away from my fucking refuge and move to somebody’s house to be stressed every fucking second. NO JUST NO!
I am having dificulties to sleep, to control my anxiety and the overeating accompany it and to control my emotions lately.
I want peace and a nice clear diet full of nutritive food that balance my mood changes and I am not going to have any of these…
I’m a little fed up of people telling me how my body should be. It is the way I want it to be.
And NO, you should not say how much I should eat (specially if you don’t know me)
I can’t be happier for having the courage to talk with my boyfriend about my problems.
I love him a lot.
Oh, shit, I feel terrible… I’m trying not to fall apart and keep going and going because at some point I know it is going to be okay but, you know, I keep also losing control and having such big twists in my mind and… I don’t know…
Also, I feel like I’m being judged for other people’s fault. I know it is sometimes uncontrollable to kind of hostility to what a person who hurt you used to do but I am not responsible of that and I am really feeling bad for doing things I enjoy just because I KNOW and I can actually FEEL the hostility towards that.
You know what? I am really hurt in this moment and I really hate writing this exact post in this right moment when I want to fucking yell it to a very important person to me, cry like a crazy and be hold for a long time until I fall asleep.